The UK is not alone — but we do it so much better

Gold medals can get awarded for all manner of sporting competitions, but to win the European Can Kicking Championships requires a very special ability. The winner is the country that doesn’t want to compete and kicks the can furthest down the road.

Beyond the long grass lies a mountain of kicked cans and, on top of heap, sits the UK’s can of full fibre worms. The UK is, of course, not entirely alone — but, sir, we do it so much better. We can denigrate investments as ‘subsidies’, hype narrow to be broad, declare…